"Sometimes the truth hurts. In those situations, I recommend lying."
"In a fight, you have to be careful not to hurt the little bones in your hands. That's why I like bathrooms: lots of hard surfaces."
"It sounded like you might die. And I wanted to be there, at the end. To tell you what a bastard you were."
"I've never found a good way to hide a gun in a bathing suit."
"So stay where everyone is a Jell-o shot away from alcohol poisoning. If you spot anyone who can walk a straight line, that's the Fed."
I. Love. This. Show.