?

Log in

No account? Create an account

Previous Entry | Next Entry

The Onion

"I tried to put it in the simplest possible terms for you people, so you'd get it straight, because I thought it was pretty important," said God, called Yahweh and Allah respectively in the Judaic and Muslim traditions. "I guess I figured I'd left no real room for confusion after putting it in a four-word sentence with one-syllable words, on the tablets I gave to Moses. How much more clear can I get?"

"But somehow, it all gets twisted around and, next thing you know, somebody's spouting off some nonsense about, 'God says I have to kill this guy, God wants me to kill that guy, it's God's will,'" God continued. "It's not God's will, all right? News flash: 'God's will' equals 'Don't murder people.'"

--"God Angrily Clarifies 'Don't Kill' Rule", The Onion, September 26, 2001

Profile

I love the world (xkcd)
raindroproses
like a psychotic rainbow
Heroine Addict

Latest Month

March 2015
S M T W T F S
1234567
891011121314
15161718192021
22232425262728
293031    
Powered by LiveJournal.com
Designed by Teresa Jones